All in the Family featured the curmudgeonly Archie Bunker. Archie was television’s most famous grouch, blunt, blustering, straightforward and untouched by the PC crowd. He was the archetype of the conservative male. Michael desprately tried to reeducate him, but he persisted in his breviloquence.



Looking back at the last 40 years, we realize: ARCHIE WAS RIGHT!

12/05/2018

Yeah, So?

All the lamestream media wants is a shot, any shot, no matter how cheap or irrelevant at Trump.  Apparently Trump, the same guy who made his money building casinos and banging models, isn't "Christian" enough for our American media.  I never thought he was a Christian or that faith was an important part of Donald Trump's life.  Did anyone else? Seriously, did you?

Donald, Melania Trump Don't Recite Apostles' Creed or Sing Hymns Unlike Obamas, Clintons at George H.W. Bush Funeral


CNN commentator Keith Boykin posted a clip of the moment, writing about Trump alongside the video: "This is your 'Christian' evangelical president."

So freaking what?  Since when did CNN become concerned about the intricacies of "Christian" funeral services?  Guess what.  I've gone to church and to church funerals for over 45 years.  Never once have I recited the Apostles Creed, either in church or at a funeral.  I'm sure lots of folks have, because their denomination does it that way.  I'm also sure that lots of other folks haven't.  It's not a big deal, to any Christian I know.

The way the media is freaking out you'd think Trump was doing the Macarena during the eulogy.  Obama knew the words, the Clintons knew the words.  They sang a hymn.  Our first Muslim president is a better Christian than Trump.  Blah, Blah, Blah.

There are a lot of people who are better Christians than Trump.  The same thing could be said of me or of you, or of just about anybody.  It's the height of hypocrisy for the news media, arguably as anti-Christian an industry as there is, to complain about a man not reciting a creed that not all Christians profess, and not signing a hymn at a funeral.

I've been to funerals preformed at different churches.  If I don't know what to do, I sit, stand or kneel along with everyone else.  If I don't know the words to what they are reciting or singing or praying I'm quite and respectful.  Which is what I saw Trump doing in that video.  It's what I would have done.  I'd bet that its what most every other polite person in America would have done in the same situation.

No mater what would have happened at Bush's funeral, Trump would have been the target of fake news mud slinging.

BJW - Medical

Fred was unfortunate enough to be hit by a 10-ton truck and landed up in hospital in intensive care. His best friend Morris came to visit him.

Fred struggles to tell Morris, "My wife Sally visits me three times a day. She's so good to me. Every day, she reads to me at the bedside."

"What does she read?"

"My life insurance policy."



Modern Medicine
Modern medicine has come up with some great new stuff to make life easier...

St. Mom's Wort -- Plant extract that treats Mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours.

Empty Nestrogen -- Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait til they moved out.

Flipitor -- Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

Antiboyotics -- When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving grades, freeing up phone lines and reducing money spent on make-up.

Menicillin -- Potent antiboyotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person..."

Buyagra -- Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and duration of spending spree.

Extra Strength Buy-one-all -- Caution, when combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura.

Jack Asspirin -- Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number.

Anti-talksident -- A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers.

Ragaman -- When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself.



Miracle Cure?
Doctor Bloomfield, who was known for extraordinary treatment of arthritis, had a waiting room full of people when a little old lady, almost bent over in half, shuffled in slowly, leaning on her cane. When her turn came, she went into the doctor's office and, amazingly, emerged within 5 minutes walking completely erect with her head held high.

A woman in the waiting room who had seen all this rushed up to the little old lady and said, "It's a miracle! You walked in bent in half and now you're walking erect. What did that doctor do?"

"Gave me a longer cane."



11/28/2018

BJW - Top Ten...

Rules for Good Housekeeping

1. It is time to clean out the refrigerator when something closes the door from the inside.

2. Keep it clean enough for healthy, dirty enough for happy.

3. Never make fried chicken in the nude.

4. Do not engage in unarmed combat with a dust bunny big enough to choke the vacuum cleaner.

5. Make the beds, do the dishes and six months later start all over again.

6. To hang up more clothes buy bigger door knobs.

7. Sweep the room with a glance.

8. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

9. Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduce the glare from the bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere.

10. When writing your name in the dust on the table, omit the date.

11/21/2018

BJW - Smart Cop

A newly deputized police officer responded to a report of a bar room disturbance.

The "disturbance" turned out to be well over six feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds.  What's more he boasted that he could whip the deputy and the "Heavy Weight Boxing Champion of the World."

Said the policeman, "I'll bet that you're also an escape artist too; probably better than Houdini."

The giant nodded.

"If I had some chains," the deputy continued, "you could show us all how strong you really are.  But all I've got is a set of lousy handcuffs. Why don't you show us just how quickly you can break out of them?"

Once in the cuffs, the man puffed, pulled and jerked for four minutes.

"I can't get out of these," the giant growled.

"Are you sure?" the deputy gingerly asked.

The fellow tried again.  "Nope," he replied.  "I can't do it."

"In that case," said the deputy, "you're under arrest."

11/14/2018

BJW - Random Thoughts

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.

I had amnesia once -- or twice.

Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

They told me I was gullible ... and I believed them.

Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto a freeway.

Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long.

Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.

When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to look like a nail.

A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.

How can there be self-help "groups"?

Is there another word for synonym?

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

The speed of time is one-second per second.

Is it possible to be totally partial?

Is Marx's tomb a communist plot?

If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off.

It's not an optical illusion. It just looks like one.

Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

11/11/2018

100 Years of 11:11:11

I do not know the identity of the Author.  I would gladly credit them.

UP DATE

“Just a Common Soldier” 
A. Lawrence Vaincourt 

He was getting old and paunchy
And his hair was falling fast,
And he sat around the Legion,
Telling stories of the past.

Of a war that he once fought in
And the deeds that he had done,
In his exploits with his buddies;
They were heroes, every one.

And 'tho sometimes to his neighbors
His tales became a joke,
All his buddies listened quietly
For they knew whereof he spoke.

But we'll hear his tales no longer,
For old Bob has passed away,
And the world's a little poorer
For a Soldier died today.

He won't be mourned by many,
Just his children and his wife.
For he lived an ordinary,
Very quiet sort of life.

He held a job and raised a family,
Going quietly on his way;
And the world won't note his passing,
'Tho a Soldier died today.

When politicians leave this earth,
Their bodies lie in state,
While thousands note their passing,
And proclaim that they were great.

Papers tell of their life stories
>From the time that they were young
But the passing of a Soldier
Goes unnoticed, and unsung.

Is the greatest contribution
To the welfare of our land,
Someone who breaks his promise
And cons his fellow man?

Or the ordinary fellow
Who in times of war and strife,
Goes off to serve his country
And offers up his life?

The politician's stipend
And the style in which he lives,
Are often disproportionate,
To the service that he gives.

While the ordinary Soldier,
Who offered up his all,
Is paid off with a medal
And perhaps a pension, though small.

It is not the politicians
With their compromise and ploys,
Who won for us the freedom
That our country now enjoys.

Should you find yourself in danger,
With your enemies at hand,
Would you really want some cop-out,
With his ever waffling stand?

Or would you want a Soldier--
His home, his country, his kin,
Just a common Soldier,
Who would fight until the end?

He was just a common Soldier,
And his ranks are growing thin,
But his presence should remind us
We may need his like again.

For when countries are in conflict,
We find the Soldier's part
Is to clean up all the troubles
That the politicians start.

If we cannot do him honor
While he's here to hear the praise,
Then at least let's give him homage
At the ending of his days.

Perhaps just a simple headline
In the papers that might say:
"OUR COUNTRY IS IN MOURNING,
A SOLDIER DIED TODAY."