Thirsty ice fishermen can no longer receive beer deliveries via drones in Minnesota
Ice fisherman in central Minnesota will no longer be able to have beer delivered to them by a drone. Lakemaid Beer had been testing a drone delivery service on Lake Mille Lacs, one of the most popular fishing destinations in Minnesota. Fishermen simply called in with their coordinates, and a drone was sent carrying refreshments.
After news of the drone deliveries started to go viral, the FAA found out and grounded the service.I've ice fished and I may do it again. While I can't remember the last time I caught a fish through the ice, I consider myself one of the worlds foremost experts on the subject. There are some things you need to ice fish effectively. Lots of thick ice, some method of drilling a hole in it, fishing gear and alcohol. Other things like a shanty and a source of heat are nice, as are a truck with a good heater.
Out of all those things on the list all you really need is the ice and alcoholic beverages. True if you don't have a hole chopped in the ice and fishing gear you aren't likely to catch fish. That's a minor detail. Nobody goes ice fishing to catch fish. If you didn't have serious issues in your life forcing you out of doors in subzero weather and a jones for booze you wouldn't go.
Yeah, you might be ice fishing for the fun of it. Frostbite is fun, right? If there is a more miserable place to be in the winter time than Minnesota, its got to be North Dakota. That's not the point.
It's Minnesota, its February, its -14 outside and the wind is blowing, its snowing and its never going to stop! On the downside a married man has been confined to his house for at least 60 days with his wife, kids and a gaggle of relatives at Christmas. What's a man to do? Football is over, and
On the upside, that man has a fishing shanty and the ice is thick enough to drive on. He artfully explains to his wife that the boss is sending him to a convention in Duluth for the week. Then he goes to his boss to get him to cover with the wife. The boss makes him a deal they'll both lie for each other, and he'll buy the propane for the heater and go half on the rest. Sitting in an outhouse on a frozen lake, smoking cigars and eating Van Camps baked beans beats the heck out of the other winter activities in Minnesota.
The only problem with the plan is that there is no way you can pack a shanty and enough beer to keep two men ice fishing for a week in a pick-up truck. That's where the drones came in. The drones kept everyone happy and safe. Just place your order and the drones bring out the beer. Every couple of hours a new case of beer arrives. Nobody had to drive into town to get it, it just showed up, like liquid manna from heaven. A routine develops; drink, fish, piss, oh look more beer, bring it inside before it freezes, repeat.
The ice fisherman got to stay on the lake. Maybe the extra time fishing helped him catch more fish, maybe not. It doesn't matter. That time
Damn you FAA! What do you have against traditional Midwestern marriage?
There is nothing like a week spent too drunk to fish, passed out on the ice breathing stale cigars and baked been farts, to make a man go back to his flannel clad wife who hasn't shaved her legs or pits since August and feel like getting frisky.