All in the Family featured the curmudgeonly Archie Bunker. Archie was television’s most famous grouch, blunt, blustering, straightforward and untouched by the PC crowd. He was the archetype of the conservative male. Michael desprately tried to reeducate him, but he persisted in his breviloquence.

Looking back at the last 40 years, we realize: ARCHIE WAS RIGHT!



I tried to catch some fog. I mist.

When chemists die, they barium.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

The girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type O.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

Energizer Bunny arrested: Charged with battery.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!

Broken pencils are pointless.


  1. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

    Come on guys that one was BJW gold! The only way it could have been better is if he was nearsighted and said "excuse me is that your boob?".

  2. WaterBoy5:51 PM

    Puns are really only good for one shot, and most of these I've seen already -- including the "bra" one.

    I would subject you to the worst one I ever heard, using "perpendicular", but I don't want to get banned.

  3. It's BJW not OJW.

    There is no banning for bad jokes. Let us have it.

  4. WaterBoy1:41 AM

    When the thief was found hiding in the corner of the restaurant's walk-in refrigerator, he was perpendicular.

  5. WaterBoy11:58 AM

    The carnival barker claimed he had a special orating potato, but really it could only read from a was just a commentator.

  6. WaterBoy6:32 PM


    O = Outlawed?