The Second American Revolution
An Utterly Objective Analysis
The Revolution of 2019 began, curiously enough, in fall of 2019 when Mary Lou Johnson, the nine-year-old daughter of a ranching family outside of Casper, Wyoming, came home from her sex-ed class at Martin Luther King Elementary with a banana, a packet of condoms, and a book called Sally Has Two Mommies. Her mother Janey Lou, a political reactionary, took one look and began screaming. “Goddamit! Goddamit! I’m not going to take it anymore!”
She grabbed the shotgun, a nice Remington 870 loaded with double-ought buck, and headed for the school.
Historians would debate just what led the surrounding population spontaneously to join her. Much of it seemed to have something to do with the schools.Other than leaving out our contempt for the wolves, Fred pretty much nailed it. Enjoy.