A woman in southern Sweden has been charged for attempted assault after attacking a man with a frying pan full of Swedish sausages.
What is it with the Sweeds and their sausage? They have issues with sausage adds being "too sexy". They even have gender experts that comment on improper uses of the sausage as a phallic symbol. and counter protesters who like sexy sausage adds.
Clearly the only responsible course of action is to outlaw assult sausage and require stricter registration of all hot dog like food products. Then and only then can the sausage return to its proper place in Sweedish culture:
The falukorv was even a central character in one of Sweden's cult pornographic films from the seventies, Fäbodjäntan (titled "Come and Blow the Horn" in the UK).
Packages of hot dogs should be limited to six and there should be a two week waiting period on buns.
ReplyDeleteAccess to condiments should be restricted to people who pass a training class and background check. The size of the packages should be limited too. Who needs the five gallon jug of mustard at Sams Club anyway?
ReplyDeleteNo wrapping the dogs in foil to keep them warm while transporting them, without a Concealed Carry permit.
ReplyDeleteAnd absolutely no open carry of condimented dogs. It's way to easy to splatter innocent bystanders.