All in the Family featured the curmudgeonly Archie Bunker. Archie was television’s most famous grouch, blunt, blustering, straightforward and untouched by the PC crowd. He was the archetype of the conservative male. Michael desprately tried to reeducate him, but he persisted in his breviloquence.



Looking back at the last 40 years, we realize: ARCHIE WAS RIGHT!

7/04/2013

4th Groaner


In 1873, a team of German explorers and their three dogs decided to penetrate the heart of the South American jungle.

After twelve years, they had set up a fort in an Incan town, the centerpiece of which was a large idol with a huge ruby for an eye.

The German church had sent out their best man, Friar Wilhelm Werks, three times to check on the progress of the fort, and each time the appearance of the idol had sent him into fits of screaming, complete with shouts, curses, and rending of garments. Each time, he screamed so loudly that he sent the dogs running for cover. And each time, he left with a warning that the next time he visited, the idol had better be torn down.

The commander of the fort, Hans Brickner, received a message that Friar Werks would be coming to visit again in a fortnight. He quickly called a meeting with his top commanders. All five agreed that the friar would explode when he saw the idol still standing.

"But," said Commander Brickner, "there's nothing to be done.

If we take down the idol, we will anger the local tribe, and without their cooperation, we're dead."

His second-in-command, Herr Kommandant Wagner, said, "In that case, we'd better make sure we put the dogs away."

"Why?"

 

"You know how scared the dogs get when Friar Werks goes off on the Fort of Jewel Eye."

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