Yo Mama

I remember when these were cool...

Yo mama so fat God told her he had no room in heaven and the devil said there was no room in hell.

Yo Mama so fat her BMI is measured in acres.

Yo Mama so fat when she went to the movies she sat next to everyone.

Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up.

Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"

Yo mama so stupid she tried to put her m&ms in alphabetical order.

Yo mama so stupid she put paper on the television and called it paper view.

Yo mama so stupid she went to the orthodontist to get a blue tooth.

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a mattress store and sleep on the floor.

Yo mama so stupid she thinks taco bell is a mexican phone company.

Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!

Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!

Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her.

Yo mama so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.

Yo mama so lazy that she came in last place in a snail marathon.

Yo mama so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush!

Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!

Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"

Yo mama so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.

Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.

Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp.

Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage."

Yo mama so poor she drives a peanut.

Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.
Yo mama so bald, when she braids her hair, it looks like stitches.

Yo mama so bald, when she puts on a turtle neck she looks like a roll on deodorant.

Yo mama so bald, when she goes to bed, her head slips off the pillow.

Yo mama so bald even a wig wouldn't help!

Yo mama so bald you can see whats on her mind

Yo mama so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.

Yo mama so hairy the only language she speaks is wookie.

Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!

Yo mama so hairy she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock.

Yo mama so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!

Yo mama so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.

Yo Mama's so nasty, she only changes her drawers once every 10000 miles.

Yo Mama's so nasty, she went to a hair salon and told the stylist to cut her hair, then she opened up her blouse!!

Yo Mama's so nasty, when I went to yo house said whats for dinner, yo mama put her foot up on the table and said "Corn!"

Yo Mama's so nasty, she has a sign around her neck that says: "Warning: May cause irritation, drowsiness, and a rash or breakouts."

Yo Mama's so nasty, she made Speed Stick slow down.

Yo Mama's so nasty, she made Right Guard turn left.

Yo Mama's so nasty, she went swimming and made the Dead Sea.

Yo Mama's so nasty, I talked to her over the computer and she gave me a virus.

Yo Mama's so nasty, a skunk smelled her butt and passed out.

Yo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.

Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

Yo mama so old, When she farted dust came out!

Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died.

Yo mama so old her social security number is 1!

Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class.

Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.

Yo mama so old her birth certificate says expired on it.

Yo mama so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.

Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

Yo mama so old she ran track with dinosaurs.

Yo mama so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.