BJW -- More Cops

Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over a 100 miles per hour. "Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel, "see any cops following us?" The blonde turned around for a long look. "As a matter of fact, I do." "Oh, NOOOO!" yelled the brunette. "Are his flashers on?" The blonde turned around again. "Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."

One day, a Man was filling his gas tank at a Gas Station; he filled the tank so full that gasoline got on his shirt sleeve; unaware that there was gasoline on his sleeve, he lit a cigarette and his sleeve caught fire,  so he jumped into his car, waved his arm up and down in an effort to put out the flames.  He looked into his rear view mirror and saw red, white and blue lights flashing and heard a police siren;
the Policeman pulled him over, got out of his Patrol Car, and arrested the driver for having and illegal Firearm.

Chap walking through the park at night hears a lady's voice in the bushes! "Fancy a good time, only 5 quid?"

 "Why not", he thinks. He is just about to grope the lady when a policeman shines his torch!

 "What's going on?", asked the policeman.

 "Do you mind", replied the chap, "I am about to have sex with my wife!"

 "Sorry", said the policeman "didn't realize it was your wife!"

 "Neither did I till you shone your bloody torch!" responded the husband

Police Officer: "How high are you?"

 Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"