All in the Family featured the curmudgeonly Archie Bunker. Archie was television’s most famous grouch, blunt, blustering, straightforward and untouched by the PC crowd. He was the archetype of the conservative male. Michael desprately tried to reeducate him, but he persisted in his breviloquence.



Looking back at the last 40 years, we realize: ARCHIE WAS RIGHT!

4/13/2015

My Rabbi

I had an interesting conversation this last week.  The man claimed to be a Jew.  He sort of looked Jewish, but didn't have a Jewish sounding name.  He said he was a Jew, and he is in "the biz" as they say.  Seemed like a generally nice guy.

The conversation started off with his commenting on the gun culture in Wyoming.  He let me know he was very knowledgeable about "firearm proliferation issues".  I was at work.  He was a customer.  I remained engaged in the conversation but uncommented about almost everything he had to say.

When he got to the part about crime rates I cut him off.  I said something about how high rates of gun ownership and racial homogeneity generally resulted in a non-violent society.  I was smiling and being very cocktail party pleasant.  His eyed narrowed and his breathing seemed shallower than it was just seconds before.  I could tell, he wanted to go all out liberal on me.

His problem was where to start.  I had given him no ammunition.  I hadn't disagreed with anything he had said.  I hadn't even taken the bait when he was talking about political parties.  Literally nothing I said in our conversation to this point allowed him a solid insight to my personal or political views about anything.  I had for all intents and purposes indicated that 1.) gun ownership was good and 2.) racial diversity was bad.

I hadn't planned this masterful turn of conversational events.  I had pissed off a liberal, without saying anything politically incorrect.  I just wanted to keep from saying anything that would be reported back to the powers that be as a negative reflection on me, but still maintain some rhetorical dignity.

The liberal, Jewish, anti-gun, show biz SJW just knew that he had a racist, gun owning, 4x4 driving, redneck, SOB on his hands.  I could tell he wanted to verbally rip me to shreds and demonstrate his enlightened liberal world view.  He didn't have an opening.  I hadn't actually said anything racist or even impolite.  I just said that lower racial diversity and high gun ownership resulted in less violent crime.  I knew, that he knew, that both statements are true.

That's when I started having fun.

He went after the racial issue tooth and claw.  He brought up everything he could think of to get a response from me.  I mean everything.  Immigration, illegal immigration, Hispanics in general, Asians, Blacks, Indians.  I didn't respond to any of it, other than to affirm that he was speaking to me.

He decided to prove how American multi cultural he was.  He lived in CA now, but he had lived in the deep south, and more importantly Montana, so he knew all about "our culture", "out here".

Here in white trash, red neck fly over country, its considered polite when someone tells you they are from a place to ask them some specifics.  Its just common stuff like where did you go to school or do you remember the old drive in, or did you know so and so.  It's conversational and considered good manners.

So when he said he was from Montana, I asked where.  Now I used to live in Montana, but I didn't happen to say that.  What I said was "oh where in Montana, my Rabbi is from there".

I don't look Jewish.  I don't have a Jewish sounding name.  When I mentioned I had a Rabbi his mouth fell open and stayed that way.  He looked at his watch.  He stuck out his hand for me to shake.  I guess he remembered he had someplace to be.  He said he hoped he saw me next time he came to town and we exchanged pleasantries.

I have never seen a liberal shut up so fast.

Rabbi B,

Thank you for engaging my questions on Judaism.  Thank you for your instruction.  Thank you for sending me your liturgies.  Thank you for your help in my studies.  I'm still working my way through the Neusner book and should probably write a  report on it.  Most importantly thank you for being ""my Rabbi".  If I knew how much fun it is having a Rabbi for a friend when talking to liberals, I would have gotten one years ago.

12 comments:

  1. Best compliment ever! Truly a privilege and an honor to be included in the ranks of "your Rabbi".

    Too bad you didn't get a chance to tell him about the circumstances of our meeting over at VP:

    Rabbi B: I am looking for a new gun.

    Res Ipsa: Why do you want a new gun? What do you want the gun to do, i.e. its mission?

    Rabbi B: Effectively intimidate and neutralize the bad guys with minimal chance of malfunction or misfire.

    And then there is the great subject line of my second email to you:

    "Circumcision, Guns, and Ammo"

    I never tire of telling you what a pleasure it has been and continues to be sharing what little I can with someone I have come to respect very much.

    Passover and other responsibilities have kept me fairly occupied of late, but I have been meaning to check in with you and catch up a bit. Hope to do so in the next day or two. All my best to you and your family.

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    1. I assumed you were swamped with work and study for your exam. Which I hope went well. I have been teaching again and my study time is less because of it. So my progress has been slower than I thought in the Talmud and in my supplemental readings.

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  2. Rabbi B can correct me if I am wrong, but isn't the Jewish line determined by the mother? So a person could have a non Jewish name but yet still be Jewish because of the mother.

    I believe a lot of Jews escaped death in the camps during WWII because of that fact about their faith. Probably why the Germans did so much profiling based on facial features too.

    Awesome argument tactic by the way. Wait until you get to try that on your kids when they are in their teens. It will make their little heads explode.

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    1. I gotta admit, it wasn't so much a tactic as I was at work and not able to speak my mind. It worked out great but I hadn't planned it. What I was wanting to work in was a bit about the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising in WWII. That didn't happen. After that part of history you'd think Jews would join the NRA first and the anti defamation league second.

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  3. Been there, done that when it comes to opinions and dealing with customers. But it is a great tactic.

    My own personal observation regarding the Jewish people, they have always been top flight and fierce warriors when properly motivated. But unfortunately in this Country, they have gotten so complacent and comfortable they have no motivation to stop the rush to their own destruction when it comes to politics.

    No disrespect meant to the good Rabbi B. Just an observation in general of what I have noticed between American Jews and the Jews of Israel.

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  4. "So a person could have a non Jewish name but yet still be Jewish because of the mother."

    Certainly. Res Ipsa could also be a secret convert . . . :)

    " . . . they have gotten so complacent and comfortable they have no motivation to stop the rush to their own destruction when it comes to politics."

    A fair observation. We have historically been our own worst enemy. Many of our Sages attribute the destruction of the Second Temple to 'baseless hatred' fomented among our own. All of our exiles have begun with infighting and jealousy among our own. Think Joseph and his brothers. The current exile is no exception. Probably why one of Y'shua's last prayers on earth was for the unity of the Jewish people.

    It's far from perfect in Israel, but there is a greater sense of unity and far less complacency than we find here in America. Hard to remain complacent when you are literally surrounded by people who want to destroy you and where the fight for survival is very palpable. Complacency in Israel my very well get you killed.

    I believe that Jews will soon find themselves in similar straits sooner rather than later. At least it's beginning to look that way to me. We'll see.

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    1. I thank you for your response sir and I totally agree with you about Israeli Jews. I think when you live your life getting up in the morning and not knowing if you are coming home at the end of the day, it refocuses your priorities to what is important. It is surprising what is not important to live a good life.

      If this country sees more terror attacks, I think it might actually start sinking in with the American Jews that "hey, we are in deep trouble", and they might start getting their political acts together. I would like to see them take their heads out of the sand regarding the democrat party.

      I understand deep in my heart why God loves the Jewish people like He does. Because I find I love them too. Especially their cuisine. I hope that doesn't come off too superficial, but it is true.

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  5. Replies
    1. Thanks, but I just dumb lucked into it. I know Rabbi B's name but I couldn't think of it, so I just "my rabbi".

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  6. Stilicho1:52 PM

    Rabbi B, I think you can safely add "Rabbi to the Dread Ilk" to your resume and business cards at this point. Should be an interesting conversation starter

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    1. Would this not be unlike trying to herd cats for our good Rabbi? The pastor fellow(JDC iirc) over at Vox's place does his best, but the ilk are a rowdy bunch. I say that with all love and respect of course.

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  7. "Rabbi to the Dread Ilk"

    Hmm . . I have to admit, it has a nice ring to it . . . a real paradigm shift . . . I have to come up with a good logo. :)

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