Ephesians 5

Eph 5:22-25

22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her;
NASB

I have had this verse explained to me thus:

Women are to submit/respect their husbands if he is a good Christian man who is loving her like Christ loved the Church.

Do you agree?

I don’t, although I was taught to see this verse this way since I was a small child. We tend to see the right to be loved as unconditional. The man is to love his wife unconditionally, as Christ loved the Church.

In our culture we often say that respect is earned. Is that what is being taught here? It’s not uncommon for a wife to say she’ll submit/respect her husband when he does X. This is just a way of her putting a condition on her respect/submission. What if her husband put similar conditions on his love for her?

I believe that this passage applies unconditionally to both men and women. The Christian woman is to be in unconditional submission to her husband and the Christian man is to unconditionally love and care for his wife. This passage has nothing to say to unbelievers, indeed the Bible has little to say to an unbeliever at all, beyond repent.

You might be thinking that this is all well and good if both the man and women are doing this for each other. So what happens if one spouse believes and the other does not, or one is doing their part and the other is not? The person with the most spiritual maturity will implement God’s requirement on their life first, and trust Him to work out the rest.

OK go ahead and word em up.