Much About Mel

As a rule I can’t be bothered to give a flip about Hollywood or the weenies that inhabit it. Take the Gibson story. The facts boil down to: celebrity gets drunk, gets stopped for DUI, shoots off his mouth at the cops, gets cuffed and hauled off to jail. Yawn. Doesn’t this happen on a near daily basis in California?

What’s the big deal? The big deal is Mel made a movie about Jesus that was proclaimed to be the anti Semitic movie of all time. Then when he gets busted for DUI he spouts off a bunch of anti Jewish crap at the Jewish cop that pulled him over.

The reason I’m bring it up is we can learn a lesson form Mel. When you screw up, no matter how bad, apologize immediately. The worse your mistake or the more public it is, the faster and more publicly you should beg forgiveness.

This is where Mel shines in this incident. Look at his words:

"The arresting officer was just doing his job and I feel fortunate that I was apprehended before I caused injury to any other person,"

"I acted like a person completely out of control when I was arrested, and said things that I do not believe to be true and which are despicable. I am deeply ashamed of everything I said, and I apologize to anyone who I have offended,"

"I am a public person, and when I say something, either articulated and thought out, or blurted out in a moment of insanity, my words carry weight in the public arena. As a result, I must assume personal responsibility for my words and apologize directly to those who have been hurt and offended by those words."

"I'm not just asking for forgiveness," he said. "I would like to take it one step further, and meet with leaders in the Jewish community, with whom I can have a one-on-one discussion to discern the appropriate path for healing."

"I have begun an ongoing program of recovery and what I am now realizing is that I cannot do it alone," he said. "I am in the process of understanding where those vicious words came from during that drunken display, and I am asking the Jewish community, whom I have personally offended, to help me on my journey through recovery. Again, I am reaching out to the Jewish community for its help. I know there will be many in that community who will want nothing to do with me, and that would be understandable. But I pray that that door is not forever closed."

This incident will eventually go away for Gibson, at least in the public's mind. He will be forgiven by his newly discovered fan base that is mostly Christian. Even though that group is made up of people that condemn the things he has done. The reason is that Mel made an appropriate apology.

1. Admit you’re wrong
2. Absolve others of blame, “officer was just doing his job”
3. Acknowledge what you’ve done
4. Confess the offensiveness of your action
5. Offer penance

The faster you make amends, the fewer repercussions you will face. People don’t want to look bad to others and being unforgiving in the face of a penitent person is socially unacceptable. After the apology this is what the arresting officer had to say:

"I don't take pride in hurting Mr. Gibson," Mee said. "What I had hoped out of this is that he would think twice before he gets behind the wheel of a car and was drinking. That would be my hope that this would accomplish that. I don't want to ruin his career. I don't want to defame him in any way or hurt him."

Interestingly the cop was also willing to give Gibson a pass on the bad behavior too:

"That stuff is booze talking," the deputy said. "There's two things that booze does. It amplifies your basic personality. If you are a laid-back kind of person, just an easygoing kind of person, booze is going to amplify that and you'll be just sitting around going how it's a wonderful day.

"But, if you are a high-strung person, it's going to amplify that, and all the bad things are going to come out."

Compare the reaction of the cops in the Gibson case to those involved with the Rep Cynthia “Gangsta Bitch” McKinney. McKinney’s statement after assaulting a cop has two main points:

1. It’s whitey’s fault
2. Fuck da police

Reaction towards Mel Gibson has been reconciliatory both from the general public and the police department. Yet the DC cops are still calling for McKinney’s head. Both broke the law, one apologized and the other one refused to accept responsibility and further antagonized the situation.

In a situation you can respond from pride or from humility. If you are humble even your adversary will admire and sometimes defend you. Your sincere apology will soften his zeal in persecuting you.